Lonely Night, Lonely Me

Six weeks left… I am still counting down… Next week is a siong week… I have both supervisor’s and principal’s observations (wed n thurs) in one week… luckily there’s still Good Friday to look forward to… long weekend… not realli tat long but every day counts…

I am feeling lonely… I hate to admit it but I realli am… maybe tis busy n stressful period is making me emotionally vulnerable… at the end of a busy day or during a preciously short weekend, how I long to have someone by my side… to listen to my troubles… to hold my hand and tell me I’m not alone… to give me a warm hug when I’m feeling down…

Sadly… when I reach out my hand, all I grab is emptiness… it gets depressing at times… I have always been a happy-go-lucky guy (at least in other people’s eyes)… but now I cun find any reason to be happy… there’s no motivation or spirit in me… every morning before I go to school, I look into the mirror and have tis same thought “The start of another pointless, meaningless day…”

A few of my frenz asked me if I regret signing the bond to be a teacher… well, I dun realli know… ya the work is shitty, hours are long (including those spent at home planning lessons), lack of sleep blah blah blah… but all these are not the source of my unhappiness… afterall, I always know the harsh reality tat there’s problems n difficulties to overcome in ANY job… but the sad thing is tat after going thru all the shit, there’s noone there by ur side… well… not exactly noone… thankfully, my parents are still there for me and I realli appreciate them being there for me… but maybe I’m greedy… it’s juz not enough… there’s always the feeling of something missing…

Scorpios are hopeless romantics (ya ya… I am blaming it on my zodiac again)… maybe I juz miss the good old days of being in love… maybe I’m juz too tired le ba…

说我自私也好，说我不甘寂寞也罢，我只是想有个人在我身边。。。